created especially for us: James Update (more for me than you)

Finally the James update that I've been writing and rewriting in my head for the last three months! It's such a bummer that I didn't post a little more about him and how he's changed over the last seven months (when I last updated here about him) because it's CRAZY how much he has changed. I don't even know where to start.

Right around mid-June is when James's vocabulary took off and hasn't slowed down since. He's extremely chatty, loves to narrate his surroundings, and is often putting strings of 3-4 words together. It's crazy how huge of a difference that is from April when he first started to really talk and only had a dozen or so words in his vocabulary. One of the first words he said was "dog" and he switched over to "doggy" which came out as "gaga." He can now say dog, doggy, and Callie all very clearly but he still calls her "gaga" a lot of the time. I love that he has held on to that. Also related to Callie, if she barks he will go over to where she can hear him better (e.g. the top of the stairs) or open the back door and poke his head out saying "No bark!" It cracks me up every time. He has reached a phase where he has started saying some comical things and I'm doing my best to keep track of the especially funny things he says to look back on and share with him some day.

In my previous update about him I mentioned that he was pushing boundaries with us and "acting out." Our original solution to that was implementing time-outs, which were changing nothing. After stumbling across some information about Gentle Parenting/Parenting Without Punishment, we stopped the time outs and have been handling things from a much different perspective, essentially addressing the emotions behind/causing the actions rather than only dealing with the actions. There is a lot more info that can be found on this stuff here, here, here and several other places. Please feel free to send me a message if you have questions about it. The biggest result I have found from this is a much greater understanding of James's actions/emotions which has lead to a lot less frustration on my part and his part. I'm able to connect with him better emotionally to talk through what he is feeling, rather than just becoming frustrated and sticking him in timeout. It sounds intense, but it's actually very simple and easy to do and they catch on to things much more quickly than you would ever expect. I never expected to be able to say to my (at the time) < 2yo "I know you're frustrated, but we can't hit people because hitting hurts" and see a very quick change in his behavior. I'm definitely not perfect and this way of parenting is not without frustration (no way is) but things are SO much better for it.

James is still extremely social. He loves saying hi to people as we shop or to the neighbors when they are outside. He loves watching other kids and interacting with him. I used to struggle a lot with dropping him off for things like childcare at church because he has always cried when I did (usually recovering within about a minute) and now he's to a point where even though he doesn't want me to go, he doesn't want to leave either when I go to pick him up. It's a nice feeling knowing he's enjoying the playtime with other kids his age instead of being sad the whole time like he was when he was in the 12-18 month range.

James is very polite. Some very common phrases from him are please, thank you, and excuse me (he even says this one to Callie!). I strongly believe that it is a direct result of my using this language with him. Our kids learn from us, you can't simply tell them to say please or thank you, you need to use it yourself, even when you are talking to your kids. This rings true with a lot of other behaviors as well and I know there are definitely some that I need to model better for him. Being a parent is CONSTANTLY teaching me things about myself, it's annoying and rewarding at the same time. ;)

Some other little tidbits about James...

His two year molars came in right around when he turned two. I never would have known if I hadn't seen them popping through. I know those can be tough for some kids, thankfully James wasn't one of them!

He has yet to have a haircut! He's definitely at the point where he could use one. I'm debating about trimming it myself, but I might wait until after baby comes just so I can get a few more family photos with those amazing curls. :)

He's still very big for his age. At his two year appointment he was 71st percentile for height (probably actually a bit higher since this was the first time doing standing height) and 90th for weight.

He's a fabulous eater. Still loves his fruits and doesn't seem to very picky about most foods. Sometimes he doesn't want to try something that looks new or different to him and responds with "I don't like it" before he even tries it and asks for "azert" (dessert) instead. Tricky little man he is!

He LOVES water play, give him the hose (obviously when it's warm out) and maybe some toys and he is all set. He loves playing in the tub and standing on his step stool to play with the faucet on the bathroom sink.

We moved him to a "big boy" bed in mid-October so that the baby could have the crib. It's actually a full size bed because it was easy to just switch it from the guest room (right next to his room) into his room and move his crib into the guest room - which became the nursery. He was also very used to that bed from playing in that room so it was a relatively simple transition. He did astoundingly well with it. We put a tall baby gate on his doorway so he can't go wandering around the house during sleep times, and up until recently he was hardly getting out of bed once he was put there. I'm just so thankful that the transition was a relatively easy one.

Aaand baby coming. Lots of people have asked if James understands what is about it happen. I think definitely to some extent he is aware. We make it a point to talk with him about it frequently, read children's books about it, involve him in some of the preparations, etc. I don't think he fully grasps the idea that this baby is going to come out of me and things are going to change a lot. He seems to love babies though, especially younger ones, so I'm looking forward to seeing how he interacts with his sister.

It blows my mind how much love I have for James, that there could possibly be any room left to love another child but I know that my heart will adjust accordingly and add the extra space effortlessly. He is constantly teaching me so much. There are days when I just "need a break" but I always miss him the second I get one. Being a parent is such a strange and incredible thing, and I feel so blessed to be given the opportunity to be this amazing little boy's mama. It's like watching a magic trick take place right before my eyes every day. He doesn't seem all that different from the day before, but when I look back I see the incredible changes he has gone through, how different he is from just a few weeks ago.

Poor little guy was diagnosed with croup yesterday. He was pretty miserable yesterday and Sunday but now that the fever is gone he's much more himself today. It's crazy how different he is when he is sick. We enjoyed A LOT of couch time and snuggles yesterday and I'm thankful not only for the snuggles but that it looks like he will be in much better health when his sister makes her debut earth side. :)

Love,
-K

Picture progress:

April

Cruisin'

I made him a slide on the stairs using cardboard

So handsome and goofy before church

Water play!

LOVES to climb

And boy is he smart using it to reach things!

May

(it was a busy month, we were in Illinois 3 different weekends!)

Playing with his cousin Ruby

Snuggles with Aunt Alli (he was actually awake)

Story time with Grandma Sue before bed

I can climb up all by myself!

Playing with water beads for the first time

I made him a giant outdoor waterbed

We took this mid-May and announced at the end of the month!

Went through a phase where he did this A LOT

Pure joy

After nap snuggle time with Dad after we were in Ohio for the night

With Grandma Pam waiting to see Dad run by in his first half marathon of the year (Dam to Dam in Des Moines)

June

On our way out the door

Play time with Dad is the BEST

Ready for a ride in the bike trailer! James LOVES it and Brian loves taking him :)

For Father's Day dinner we had a picnic at a nearby park and had some play time as a family


We got A TON of rain this summer, after a particularly drenching storm I took J out to splash at the bottom of the "river" in our yard

July

Outdoor musical "story time" through the local library

We spent a lot of time outside this summer!

Playtime with Dad after he got home from work

First time at the splash park (4th of July!) LOVED IT

First time using the sensory table Brian made - playing with ice

Playing with "cloud dough"

Feeding the ducks after story time, he fell in shortly after. He's DEFINITELY his mama's child.

Favorite in the sensory table - BUBBLES!

He STILL loves emptying out the pantry (he's taking a break here and snacking on a marshmallow)

Playing with dry rice and beans - time to sweep the floor!

At the Indianola Hot Air Balloon Festival!

August

(We celebrated James's second birthday on the 30th! We celebrated with my side a week early up in MN and Brian's parents and brother came in the weekend of to celebrate the actual day with us!)

LOVES to help feed the dog

I wore him during a grocery trip in an attempt to make it easier and more efficient. It actually worked pretty well for about 2/3 of it, I've learned to just hand him a snack though and he does okay.