Wednesday January 24th I had a midwife checkup in which I was 1cm dilated and a (generous) 50% effaced, and the midwife said baby had dropped based on how I was measuring. At this point I was totally fine with that status. Since finding out my due date (February 6th by ultrasound estimation, February 3rd by my own estimation) we just assumed that baby was coming on January 30th. For those who don't know, James and Samantha's birthdays are August 30th and November 30th, and both kids had due dates early in the following month and both came on their own. Brian's birthday is December 30th and our anniversary is May 30th. It seemed silly not to assume the 30th was baby day.
Saturday January 27th I came out of the shower to find Callie laying right outside the bathroom which is not normal behavior for her at all. I felt like she had been following me around more lately too but that may have been due to her lack of exercise. I know some dogs will exhibit different behaviors for things like this but Callie hadn't done anything like that for my past pregnancies so I tried not to read too much into it.
Sunday the 28th I had felt nauseous throughout the night and had made a few trips to the bathroom in the early morning hours. This was also accompanied by Braxton Hicks but ended up being nothing to really take note of, although I did get a bit of an adrenaline spike realizing I was contracting in the middle of the night, which I can't remember ever happening in the past. Later that day Brian started having low back pain (we joked about sympathy pains) that ended up moving to one side of his back/pelvis and we started to get concerned that he may have a kidney stone. (His pain slowly got better over the next couple days but there was some fear that he may not feel well when I went into labor).
Monday the 29th we had Buffalo Wild Wings for dinner in hopes the spicy food would help get things started. The mango habanero definitely gave me some contractions but nothing of note as I went to bed.
Tuesday the 30th I was really hoping this would be the day. I even tracked the timing of my Braxton Hicks throughout the day hoping to see a change, but the day ended pretty anti-climatically. I was a little sad but continued to trust that God's timing was better than mine.
After the 30th I was feeling pretty indifferent about when I went into labor. I stopped paying such close attention and just kind of settled in for the wait. On the 31st I had another midwife checkup where I found, to my surprise, that I was still only 1cm dilated and still not really effaced. The midwife even brought in an ultrasound machine to completely confirm that baby was head down (he was) because she wasn't feeling any pressure on my cervix. I had been having so many Braxton Hicks in the past week and so much pressure on my pelvis that I was a little disappointed not to be further along. I knew things could progress quickly though so I didn't worry myself about it.
On Thursday February 1st (I'm still shocked that I made it to February!), my mom said that she and my step dad were going to come down on Friday regardless since they were going to need to be home by the 7th to get ready for an overseas trip. She was also very convinced I was going to have the baby on Friday. They arrived around 4pm on Friday and the kids, who knew they'd be coming down when the baby came, were thrilled to have them there already. After getting the kids in bed, the four of us congregated in the living room to chat and catch up. I was having Braxton Hicks here and there but had no significant feeling that labor was coming soon. I was starting to hope for Sunday, only because the date was 2/4 and my birthday is August 24. At least that was something!
I was REALLY hoping that this labor would start at some point while I was awake, but since both of my previous labors woke me up in the middle of the night to have an early morning baby, I was assuming that was going to happen again this time. So I had been paying extra attention to what was going on with my body in the evening hours and even in the middle of the night. I wavered quite a bit between anxiousness and contentment of what was to come, being woken up to realize its go time adds an extra layer of chaos to my already fast labors.
Friday before bed I snapped a quick belly shot, just in case (I had done this a few times already in the last week or so), and we went to bed.
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| 10:30pm Friday February 2nd |
I stood at the side of the bed and Brian, who had woken up, asked me how I was doing. I told him "I don't know." And I started to contract, the real kind, full back labor. Painful enough that I was having to breathe through it. I looked at the clock: 4:44am. Brian, knowing full well what was happening, replied with something like, "What do you mean?! We need to go to the hospital!" I told him to just wait a minute, I needed to know how far apart the contractions were first because I didn't want to go rushing out the door if it wasn't time yet. Turns out they were only two minutes apart and getting more and more painful. My mom had asked me to call her if I went into labor in the middle of the night to wake her up even though she was just down in the basement. At 4:49pm I called her and before I could say anything she said "I'm on my way up." I then dialed the midwives but had to have Brian talk to them as I started contracting and had to use the bathroom again. I could hear him answering informational questions for the nurse on the other end. I then asked Brian to start the car, changed and managed to put my contacts in and throw my last couple things in the hospital bag. Brian asked if I wanted my mom to come with and I said sure.
We got downstairs, I filled a water bottle and put on my shoes to leave and I noticed my phone was vibrating. It was Natalie, the midwife on call, she started asking questions and I just said "baby is coming super fast." And she said okay, if I don't make it there's a doctor there on call who can deliver and I said okay and we hung up. I wasn't worried about her not making it, just as long as we made it okay to the hospital.
We got in the car with Brian driving and my mom in the back seat. Just a couple blocks from the house as we pulled up to a stop light I looked at the time as I finished a contraction, 4:59am. I said it out loud because "459" has, since I was very young (in my mom's days of owning a pager), meant "I love you" between my mom and I (ILY = 459 on a phone keypad). My contractions were very painful by this point, constant intense pain in my lower back whether I was contracting or not in addition to very strong, painful contractions. Once and awhile I would notice that I was possibly leaking amniotic fluid with contractions but couldn't tell for sure.
Brian was mentally tracking the length of my contractions and announcing it out loud: "45 seconds long... about 45 seconds again..." I found it annoying, especially because they felt way longer than that, but I was in too much pain to care. I noticed he was driving quickly. He told me later on that he didn't know how fast he should be going because he knew things were progressing so fast that he wanted to make sure we made it to the hospital well before the baby arrived. Him tracking my contractions was his way of assessing my status.
We arrived at the hospital parking garage, I asked my mom to carry my water bottle and purse and Brian grabbed the hospital bag. Just as with my other two labors, we made it just inside the doors in the skyway before I had to stop, brace myself on the window and breathe/moan through a contraction. We made it through the next set of doors and into the hallway before I was leaning on another window loudly moaning through the pain. I asked someone to push on my back to help counter the back pain. This was the first labor I instinctively wanted that counter pressure and it definitely helped take the edge off but the contractions were still incredibly painful. I saw my mom motion to Brian to do it and take the hospital bag from him. The contraction finished and we hurried down the hallway. I quick threw my hair into a high ponytail as we walked. We made it to the elevators down the hall before the next contraction set in. I leaned over and contracted in the elevator. When the doors opened, Brian realized he had pushed the wrong button but it didn't matter anyway because I wasn't going anywhere until that contraction was over. We got to the correct floor and this time, I didn't even make it through the double doors to the front desk like I did with my first two labors before my next contraction set in. When it let up I walked through the doors. The nurses brought me a wheel chair but sitting down sounded like just about the last thing I wanted to do. They insisted because there was only one room left and it was "so far, all the way on the other end." I didn't have the energy to argue so I got in and they quickly wheeled me to my room.
I immediately walked around to the other side of the bed as I loudly worked through another contraction, having Brian push on my back again. As soon as it let up I quickly took off my sweatshirt because it felt like it was choking me and asked for water. The nurses told me that I was going to have to take my bottoms off and lay down on the bed so they could check me and hook me up to monitors. I took my bottoms off but I told them "after this contraction" as I felt the next one ramping up. I also asked for a towel on the floor under me saying that I was pretty sure my water had already broken. I worked through the contraction as Brian pushed on my back.
I quickly climbed on the bed and a nurse checked me to find that I was at a 6. I was definitely sad to hear this, thinking I had to be closer to an 8 based on my pain level. They hooked me up to the monitors and then told me I had to stay laying on the bed. I'm pretty sure a lot of inappropriate words went through my head in that moment. Laying on my back intensified the back pain immensely. I got upset with them and told them I needed to get up. They explained that they needed to monitor baby. I completely understood that but never in my other two labors did they make me lay down while they did so and I angrily informed them of that. I finally got them to let me get on hands and knees but it wasn't enough of a relief for me so I climbed off the bed and back into my spot standing on the floor. No one said anything or stopped me so there I stayed. At some point during this the midwife had come in. I remember being surprised that she made it there a lot more quickly than I thought she might. She told me that she had one of her students with her, that I may have met her at one of my prenatal appointments.
I stood next to the bed and contracted several more times as Brian pushed on my back and I watched amniotic fluid leak onto the giant chux pad as my contractions peaked. Although the pain of these contractions was far greater than any I had had with my other two labors, it was also slightly satisfying watching the waters spill out each time, like it was proof that my body was making progress. Pretty sure I also peed a little at one point during this, but what can you do. I even said out loud "that might be pee." Haha!
One of the nurses held the monitor against my stomach for awhile to make sure they were getting good readings from baby. And then as I neared the 10cm mark, I felt an instinctual urge to push as I contracted. This was something I hadn't felt with my other two labors but it felt good to push with them, not like it helped the pain but that it was what I was supposed to be doing. The midwife noticed that I was pushing and said that I was going to need to get on the bed soon. I told her I would and also said that I wanted to try pushing from hands and knees instead of on my back and she said that was fine. I asked about where they would put baby when he came out and they said they could just lay him on the bed underneath me and asked if that's what I wanted. I said yes. I worked through a couple more contractions, still very vocally and pushing with each of them now. The midwife student was on the floor now checking to make sure baby wasn't getting too close to crowning before I got on the bed. I heard a comment about "starting to bulge" and also knew I didn't have much more to go before baby was going to be crowning.
I climbed on the bed and braced on my hands and knees. It was not an easy position for Brian but God bless him, he still pushed on my back while I contracted. The contractions had now reached an excruciating pain level. The entire maternity wing was probably now aware that a baby was about to be born in room 618 by how vocal I was, but there was no avoiding it. I could have done more breathing work but it dried out my mouth so bad that it felt better to yell as I pushed with the contractions. Yell is such a terrible descriptor here. I'm not even sure how to describe it, other than a complete visceral, guttural response to the pain.
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| This picture was taken at 5:45am, the same minute Jackson was born. |
We stayed in that position for a minute while the nurses cleaned him up and then they picked him up so I could turn over and they put him on my chest.
After several minutes I birthed the placenta and they clamped the cord and Brian cut it. Shortly after that, Brian got to hold Jackson for a couple minutes and then brought him over to get weighed and measured and vaccinated.
8lbs 5oz
20 inches long
While baby was getting taken care of, they got to work on stitching me up. My tear was worse than it was with Sam, much to my disappointment, but not as bad as it had been with James. My after-labor shakes kicked in and they got me a blanket and then I had the blanket Brian's sister made put over me too. It took awhile to get me fixed up as there was a lot of teaching going on between the doctor who was called in to help, the midwife, and the midwife student. Not exactly my ideal time for chatting.
About an hour after he was born they were finally done fixing me up and Jackson was brought back to me and we snuggled under the blanket that was made for this exact moment. I was immediately brought to tears after getting to hold and look at my newborn's face again, still in such amazement and disbelief that we had another child, this tiny little person created especially for us. I then got to nurse him for the first time and finally relax into being done with all the labor and delivery stuff.
We waited to share his name, wanting James and Samantha to be the first ones to know. Five hours after he was born the kids got to meet their new baby brother for the first time. Samantha just kept saying "what's his name? what's his name?" Brian told the kids it was Jackson. James had a hard time believing it after just recently getting a new kid in his preschool class named Jackson and after having just recently watched Cars 3 again (one of the main characters names is Jackson Storm). But both kids loved it and were SO excited to meet him, very curious and excited to take turns holding him.
I am so thankful for God's timing. If things hadn't played out how they did, my mom and stepdad never would have made it down in time for the birth. And it would have been a much closer call to get to the hospital on time having to wait for Afton (my amazing friend who was on call for me if my parents weren't here) to come to the house rather than just leaving immediately like we did. And because my mom was there this time, I have pictures of this labor which is so awesome to be able to look back on. If I had to pick only one of my labors to have pictures of, this one would be it. It was such a whirlwind that I almost have trouble remembering it all. And given that it is likely my last baby, it's definitely bittersweet and nice to have this extra piece of it. I had been praying that if it wasn't God's will for baby to come on the 30th that baby would come in His perfect timing. And boy did He deliver!
February 3, 2018. The third baby on the third day of the month. Coming on 03 instead of 30. On the day I had estimated as my due date since I found out I was pregnant. And my mom and stepdad were able to stay the maximum amount of time available to them before needing to go home which was a HUGE help to us.
Jack(son) means God is gracious and is He ever! It is clear His hand has been in this since before Jackson was conceived right down to the timing of his birth. Drew was chosen because it is part of Brian's middle name (Andrew).
“For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” - Psalms 139:13-14
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